.png)
Let me guess: You’re texting him first (every time), making the plans, and trying to keep the vibe alive. You’re already putting in extra effort—stretching yourself to “show him” how amazing you are. Maybe you’ve convinced yourself that if you just give a little more, do a little more, or bend a little further, he’ll finally step up. Now, be real with yourself for a second. How’s that been working out for you?
If you’re feeling tired, frustrated, or questioning why he’s not matching your energy, sis, this is your sign. Because here’s the truth: If you have to work this hard just to keep something going in the early stages, what do you think the future with this guy is going to look like?
Let me help you picture it:
It’s you—constantly overextending yourself.You—carrying all the emotional weight.You—planning the dates, trips, dinners, and quality time while he puts in minimal (or zero) effort.You—drained, exhausted, and wondering why you’re the only one trying.
Sound familiar? Sounds miserable, doesn’t it? That’s because it is.
Here’s the deal: When someone shows you—right from the start—that they’re not interested in being your partner, believe them. Stop trying to “make” it work with men who don’t even want to work with you. Stop performing for men who aren’t lifting a finger to meet you halfway. And please, for the love of your sanity, stop bending yourself into knots to prove you’re “wifey material” for someone who can’t even meet the basic criteria for a boyfriend.
I know, I know. “But dating is hard!” Trust me, I hear it all the time. But can I let you in on a little secret? Dating only feels hard when we make it hard for ourselves—when we ignore red flags, chase potential, or try to force something that’s not meant for us.
The solution? Let go of the men who leave you questioning your worth. Choose peace over potential. When you do, you’ll create space for someone who sees your value without needing you to spell it out—or worse, perform for it.
Relationships should feel like mutual effort, not an endurance test. So stop striving, stop proving, and start letting things flow. The right man won’t leave you feeling like you’re auditioning for a role.
Food for thought. Finish your plate, so you can go be great ;)
P.S. If you’re stuck in this cycle and need help breaking free, I’ve got you. Inner work is the real game-changer, and I have books and workbooks (based on my own journey) to guide you through it. Click here and let’s get you unstuck.
Much love,
